Preaching on Quarrels: Destructive Force
Today we address a destructive force that can tear apart relationships and disrupt the peace of our communities: Quarrels. These conflicts, whether large or small, grieve the heart of God and hinder our witness to the world. Let us examine the roots of quarrels and the path towards peace.
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I. THINGS THAT CAUSE QUARRELS BETWEEN PEOPLE.
The Scriptures reveal various sources of conflict.
A. The ear stirs up strife (Proverbs 10:12). Unkind words, gossip, and listening to slander can ignite and perpetuate quarrels.
B. Pride conceives strife (Proverbs 13:10). Arrogance, a sense of superiority, and an unwillingness to yield often lead to disagreements and contention.
C. A haughty-minded person stirs up strife (Proverbs 28:25). Those who are self-important and disdainful of others are prone to causing conflict.
D. A perverse person stirs up strife (Proverbs 16:28). Those who are intentionally contrary, deceitful, and seek to undermine others will inevitably create discord.
E. He who provokes anger stirs up strife (Proverbs 30:33). Agitating others, intentionally trying to elicit a negative reaction, fuels quarrels.
F. Drunkards stir up strife (Proverbs 23:29-30). Intoxication often lowers inhibitions and leads to rash words and actions that result in conflict.
G. A hot-tempered person stirs up strife (Proverbs 15:18). Those who are easily angered and quick to react are often at the center of disputes.
H. Fools desire strife (Proverbs 18:6; 20:3). Some individuals seem to thrive on conflict, seeking it out and perpetuating it. It is an honor for a man to keep aloof from strife, but every fool will be quarreling (Proverbs 20:3).
I. Where there is no whisperer, strife ceases (Proverbs 26:20-22). Gossip and the spreading of rumors are like fuel to a fire, keeping quarrels alive. When such talk stops, the conflict often dies down.
J. Strife comes from lust (James 4:1). James reveals that the root of many quarrels lies in our selfish desires and the internal conflicts they create.
K. Foolish and unwise questions breed strife (1 Timothy 6:4; 2 Timothy 2:23). Engaging in pointless arguments, debates over trivial matters, and questions that do not lead to edification only stir up contention.
II. A DISGRACEFUL THING: QUARRELS AMONG GOD'S PEOPLE.
Conflict within the community of believers is particularly damaging.
A. The Corinthians were rebuked because of strife in the church (1 Corinthians 1:11; 3:3; 2 Corinthians 12:20). Paul strongly condemned the divisions and quarrels that were fracturing the Corinthian church.
B. Jealousy and selfish ambitions cause disorder (James 3:14-16). When we prioritize our own desires and become envious of others, it leads to confusion and every kind of evil.
C. They are works of the flesh (Galatians 5:19-21). Strife, variance, and contentions are listed among the sinful desires of our fallen nature that we must overcome through the Spirit.
D. Some indeed preach Christ out of envy (Philippians 1:15). Even in the realm of ministry, selfish motives like envy can lead to division and strife.
III. THE WAY TO PREVENT QUARTER OR QUARRELS.
The Scriptures offer clear guidance on how to avoid and resolve conflict.
A. We are to avoid quarreling (Titus 3:9; Proverbs 20:3). We are called to actively shun contention and seek peace.
B. Let us do nothing through quarreling or vain conceit (Philippians 2:3-4). Humility and a genuine concern for others should guide our actions, preventing us from engaging in selfish disputes.
C. He who is slow to anger pacifies strife (Proverbs 15:18; 17:27; 14:29; 16:14). Patience, self-control, and a willingness to overlook offenses are essential for maintaining peace. A man of understanding is of a calm spirit (Proverbs 17:27). Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding (Proverbs 14:29). A king's wrath is a messenger of death, and a wise man will appease it (Proverbs 16:14).
D. He who restrains his lips is prudent (Proverbs 10:19; 17:27; James 1:19). Careful speech, thoughtful responses, and a willingness to listen more than we speak can prevent many quarrels. Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger (James 1:19).
E. Do not associate with a hot-tempered man (Proverbs 22:24; 20:3; 1 Corinthians 15:33). Choosing our companions wisely and avoiding those prone to anger can protect us from unnecessary conflict. Bad company ruins good morals (1 Corinthians 15:33).
F. Following the way of love (1 Corinthians 13:4). Love is patient, kind, not envious or boastful, not arrogant or rude. Living in love is the ultimate antidote to strife.
G. Following Christ's example (Philippians 2:1-8). Humility, selflessness, and a willingness to serve others, as demonstrated by Jesus, are the foundation of peaceful relationships.
H. Imitating Abraham with Lot (Genesis 13:8). Abraham's willingness to yield his rights for the sake of peace provides a powerful example of how to resolve potential conflicts.
CONCLUSION:
Quarrels are a destructive force that hinders our witness and grieves the heart of God. By understanding the roots of conflict and diligently applying the principles of humility, patience, love, and self-control found in Scripture, we can cultivate peace in our hearts, our homes, and our communities. Let us strive to be peacemakers, reflecting the very nature of our God who is the Prince of Peace. Amen.
